Vacancy To Become A Rioter
Riot E-liquid have capitalised on the recent disturbance in the UK government by appealing for a minister to work for them to promote vaping to the World Health Organisation
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by Dave Cross
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Last week, Javid resigned from Boris Johnson’s administration and was replaced by former chief of staff Steve Barclay.
Barclay said: “It is an honour to take up the position of Health and Social Care Secretary. Our NHS and social care staff have showed us time and again - throughout the pandemic and beyond - what it means to work with compassion and dedication to transform lives.”
Steve Barclay has a history of being resistant to more spending on the NHS.
Following this, appearing on Riot’s Twitter and Linkdn accounts, a message said: “NEW ROLE ALERT!
“We're hiring a HEAD OF PUBLIC HEALTH to support the use of e-cigarettes and help achieve a smoke-free world. One for you @sajidjavid #publichealth #smokefree #ecigarette”.
The advert addresses Mr Javid directly and says: “We know you’re now jobless after leaving that jobsworth. The timing is perfect. Riot Labs are hiring for an exciting new role to help achieve a smoke-free world. The e-cigarette industry’s first ever Head of Public Health.”
Referencing the recent events in Downing Street, Riot continues: “We know you don’t back Boris but you do back e-cigarettes as a means to quit smoking so you’re the perfect man for the job.”
Riot lists out the job spec:
- A figurehead with an actual backbone to campaign for e-cigarettes in the UK and International markets
- Experience in developing and implementing strategies to achieve a smoke-free world by 2030
- A willingness to expose more liars and leverage your contacts at the WHO to change their anti e-cigarette stance and policy
- Oversee Riot Labs quit smoking campaign including the Riot Rehab Bus tour and out unique R.I.O.T. 4-step quit smoking plan
The lucky successful candidate will apparently waltz away with “enough [salary] to purchase golden wallpaper like Boris and Carrie”, plus travel expenses and dental cover.
Are you thinking of applying?
Photo Credit:
Photo by Eric Prouzet on Unsplash
Dave Cross
Journalist at POTVDave is a freelance writer; with articles on music, motorbikes, football, pop-science, vaping and tobacco harm reduction in Sounds, Melody Maker, UBG, AWoL, Bike, When Saturday Comes, Vape News Magazine, and syndicated across the Johnston Press group. He was published in an anthology of “Greatest Football Writing”, but still believes this was a mistake. Dave contributes sketches to comedy shows and used to co-host a radio sketch show. He’s worked with numerous start-ups to develop content for their websites.
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